Gay guys here in the Philippines have their own different dating styles (with a few who make dating a lifestyle). There are those who use the trusty online social networking and dating sites. Some go for the “I wont look for Mr. Right, I’ll just wait for him” style where they just sit idly and waiting for their man in shining armour to sweep them off their feet. 
A handful of people I know meet the loves of their life in different places - malls, bars, bookstores, coffee shops, churches and religious service venues, and uhm… mall restrooms. Then there are those who are set-up by their friends.
Many gay men out there are unsuccessful in the dating scene. Some of them end up being too jaded and too exhausted with dating.
And in Bakla’s efforts of going back into that dating scene, he cooked up some rules for himself, which he calls NS Vowels: Bakla’s Self-Imposed Rules on First Dates:
NS + Vowel = Rule
NSA - No Strings Attached
NSE - No Silly Expectations
NSI - No Sex Involved
NSO - No Sugar-coated Over-Impressing
NSU - No Self-Underselling
Bakla’s Self-Imposed Rules on First Dates:
No Strings Attached
A first date is just a first date. Think of it as having dinner with a friend, or yourself. Do not get too attached with the other person. Sure there may be chances of him being Mr. Right, but don’t bank on those chances that much. If you fall in love with this guy on the first date, you’re just fooling yourself. Regroup yourself and reorganize your thoughts. Give it a day or two before you actually think of getting yourself attached to this guy. And please, see NSI.
No Silly Expectations
Some of us believe in what people say “Love at First Sight.” Although it happens to many people, it doesn’t really apply to all of us. Some of us get too attracted by the glitter in a person’s eyes or the glitter of their cars.
Some of us tend to expect a lot when we go out on dates. We’re always too optimistic, thinking that this could go well and that this guy is Mr. Right. We must avoid silly expectations. When we go out on dates, we must avoid thinking what it would be like if this guy we’re having dinner with right now was our boyfriend. When on a date with a guy, never play your movies (starring yourself) in your mind. Just get to know the guy dear.
No Sex Involved
Unless otherwise agreed-upon that this is just a one-night stand or an NSA hook-up, never have sex on the first date. This may sound too conservative, but in my experience, equating a first date with the French Embassy is trouble. So don’t you go riding the Baloney Pony on your first date.
No Sugar-coated Over-Impressing
Do not oversell yourself. Share things about yourself in their unadulterated form. Some of us sometimes tend to oversell ourselves, adding a little bit of exaggeration in every self-information we share. To put it bluntly, stop pretending! Sure you might impress this guy, but your white lies may backfire and will eat you alive in the future.
No Self-Underselling
In relation to NSO above, NSU is the complete opposite. Some people, when they go out on dates, do not share a lot about themselves. And when faced with intimidation (i.e. uber-hot guy with exemplary achievements under his belt), we tend to just stay on the downlow and look down on ourselves. “I guess I’m not good enough for him,” is a common afterthought and we tend to just think that we’re not good enough. Isipin mo na lang, maganda ka.
